I've looked at the map when you posted it on discord. I didn't think you posted a forum post, sorry for the delay on the check.
You need a better understanding in how mania patterns work, This is not spread out well enough.
I'm not a modder, I'm a beatmap nominator - this mean I don't mod, but rather nominate maps ready for the ranked section.
I cannot seem to pick a section that is wrong as the whole map has random jacks, random patterns that doesn't seem to represent the song nor does represent a friendly gameplay to the users. 01:08:827 ~ 01:09:494 is one of the many examples, you need more ideas of how a map in this difficulty should be constructed, in this sort of pattern(this is normally called a chordstream/stream, search reddit for better examples of what you want to map, there are many) if you want to have it for ranked.
Bancho has many patterns that are ranked from 2021~2025 that is suitable for a fluid gameplay. I suggest you go and pick some maps from there - try to see what they are doing, learn the focus of them on playability and try to map this again. I highly doubt it'll be this hard in star rating, or actual gameplay.
Representation, Playability, Overall patterning, Structure - currently nonexistent. Please try to understand how this level of difficulty is made in mania on the ranked section(bancho, titanic) before submitting again.
